Monday, September 21, 2009

Dumb Gifts

Don't be a dog walker.

If you do, you'll get dumb gifts.




Oh, socks covered in dogs about to pee. How thoughtful.












Oh, there's one of those brown and black dogs, the ones the police use! What are they called again? Wait, let me check my sock.

That's right, German Shepard! I almost said German Shepherd. Wow, that would have been embarrassing.











If they did Hollywood Squares for dogs, this is what it would look like.













Cats, dogs, same difference.














I think I'll re-gift these to the first 8 year-old dog walker I meet.













At least it's not a puffy paint T-Shirt like the last time my mom went on a cruise.















Clearly a subliminal message about the superiority of cats to dogs.











Where the hell am I supposed to wear novelty socks? I WALK DOGS. If I tried to wear them for work, my hiking boots would slip right off somewhere between my front door and my van. I'd step in one mud puddle and have pneumonia and a toe rotted off within the hour.

Now if SmartWool made dog-themed socks, that would be a different story. Seriously, do people really think the next time I'm looking for some thin socks to wear with my dress up shoes I'll reach for my misspelled German Shepherd socks?